Platinum Jubilee

The Queen plonked herself on her throne.

Complaints soon sprouted.

First, the crown was too heavy.

Solved with clever use of fishing line.

Second, some concerns the whole thing looked too modest.

The throne would be jacked up a bit.

Her Majesty now looked very important and very imposing.

She delivered her message.

Everyone MUST party in her honour.

Anyone who wasn't looking delighted with their paper plates of jam sandwiches were, in her words, "looking to have their heads removed."