Rabbit

I waddled to the local bakery.

My legs

Hello.

Not again.

I said hello.

HELLO.

Hello.

Is this your friend, New Year?

I WOULD RECALL SUCH MAGNIFICENT EARS.

Thanks, chum!

YOU ARE MOST WELCOME.

And why are you here?

Well, you know.

Not particularly.

Well, what I mean is, you know, I was bounding around I suppose.

Then I suppose I just sort of landed here.

I don't suppose you have any carrots?

I DON'T TRUST CARROTS.

We don't trust carrots, no offense.

IT'S JUST THAT THEY'RE POINTED.

Like daggers.

YES.

You can't trust that sort of thing.

DO YOU PLAN ON INTRODUCING US?

We've never met!

Rabbit.

I've met Rabbit before!

BUT YOU KNOW THEY ARE CALLED RABBIT.

I think we just learned that together.

HM.

IF YOU INSIST.

BUT NOW?

I just want to be left to my poetry.

I THINK WE WILL REQUIRE A NEW BED.

We're going to need a new house at this rate.

And some carrots.

You know less than a month ago I was living here alone.

IT WAS A PATHETIC SIGHT.

Then you lot started infesting my delightful little hovel.

PATHETIC LITTLE CAVE.

Well, I suppose I could go.

You don't have any carrots after all.

NO.

YOU MUST STAY.

I HAVE UTILISED HOUSE FUNDS TO ACQUIRE A NEW BED.

My funds.

IT WOULD BE A SHAME TO SEE IT WASTED.

I really think you should ask before doing things like that.

IT IS ARRIVING BETWEEN FOUR AND TEN.

I WON'T BE IN.

PLEASE LISTEN FOR IT.